The Galaxy Guide to Adolescents and the Alien Within

 by Neal Davies

The reason I wrote this work

I wanted to allow both adults and adolescents an empathic view of each other and an objective perspective of themselves.  Most books I have seen segregate the ways adults or adolescents are seen, but this guide aims to comically deal with the topic of how adolescents and adults see each other as alien races.

Aims

• As a counsellor and a boarding house supervisor, I have worked with adolescent boys and girls, getting to know their strengths and weaknesses, and dealing with parents' concerns.
• Over time, some clear-cut messages began to emerge from both parents and teenagers. It seemed to me many parents had forgotten what it was like to be a teenager. As well, many of the parents I met had an urge to protect their sons or daughters from the mistakes they had made when they were young. This left some teenagers confused. Others believed their parents were on a power trip and felt stifled by their parents' demands.
• My aim in writing this book is to bring parents and their teenagers closer through communication and make each aware that self-control is essential.  Whenever self-control breaks down so does communication. 
• Another aim was to simplify understanding and create self-appraisal. The 'alien' creates a third person perspective or viewpoint. It is human nature to comment on how to fix someone else’s problems rather than identify and acknowledge our own mistakes. The alien gives us the opportunity to step outside ourselves, and then look back objectively.
• My final aim is to indicate to parents and adolescents that persuasion can be a positive influence, leading to a win-win situation for all.

Table of contents

      Introduction

      Helping guide; Aliens in other bodies

      Lessons from the past

      Signals

      Being honest in the nicest possible way

      Awakening the human

      Time travel

      Time travel for others

      Boarders and guidelines

      Knowing the alien within

      Believe it or not

      Positive v negative

      Expectations good or bad

      When fighting, winners are grinners without teeth

      Listening to what others say not what we want to hear

      Testing the waters

      Getting the right formula

      Do not assume

      Envy

      Protect

      Time warp

      Abnormally normal

      Consistency

      If you want to protect your children guide them to adulthood

      Personally speaking

      Listening

      How hard is communication for an adolescent?

      Communication

      Finding the problem

      Roles the parents play

      Divorce and separation

      What sort of parent are you and how much does it matter

      The under parent

      Are you all you want to be?

      Approaching adulthood

      Peers and identity

      Wants, don’t wants and requirements

      Summary

The success I have had using this method

I have used this method everywhere I have worked. My approach allows the young person to grow, to have an opinion and to feel they can express that opinion. It also helps them realise there are boundaries in life and if properly addressed, boundaries can be expanded.  This allows the young person to grow cognitively.

I feel both adolescents and parents want to communicate more readily but get frustrated when they can’t.  This book helps parents and adolescents with their approach and presents a view of the other's perspective.