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The Language of Support: Communicating Effectively with Anxious Children

Anxiety Coach

Childhood anxiety

Child and family specialists

Family support

Emotion Coaching


The Language of Support: Communicating Effectively with Anxious Children

Childhood anxiety has steadily been increasing in recent years. One of the most effective treatments for anxiety is strategic communication between children and the significant adults in their life. The Anxiety Coach course recognises this crucial aspect and equips professionals with valuable insights into the language of support and how to guide parents in implementing these strategies. The journey begins with acknowledging the profound impact words can have on a child's mental and emotional well-being. Anxiety Coach emphasises simple questions that spark problem-solving, reducing anxious thoughts and developing more rational thinking structures. It is normal to feel anxious sometimes but having parents coach their child through these moments will leave the child feeling heard, validated, and empowered.

Cognitive distortions

Cognitive distortions are biased and irrational thinking patterns that contribute to anxiousness. They include catastrophizing, black-and-white thinking, overgeneralization, mind reading, filtering, jumping to conclusions, emotional reasoning, and discounting the positive, often reinforcing negative beliefs or perceptions. By understanding and reducing these distortions, we gain a clearer perspective on situations. Significant adults can coach children through these distortions helping them see that not everything we think about needs to worry us.


Parents don’t want to see their child suffering and can often make ‘accommodations’ to help their child avoid anxious feelings; this might be allowing them to stay home from school or avoid social situations they may be anxious about. However, these are normal life ‘challenges’ and while accommodation may offer temporary relief, it reinforces the belief that the feared situation is genuinely dangerous. Over time, this avoidance and adaptation contribute to the maintenance and escalation of anxiety, creating a cycle wherein children become increasingly limited by their fears and further entrenched in maladaptive coping mechanisms. Breaking this cycle often involves addressing and challenging accommodation behaviours as part of a comprehensive approach to anxiety management. Anxiety Coach provides professionals with a framework to help parents reduce accommodation in their families.

Building a Foundation of Trust Through Emotion Coaching

Anxiety often thrives in an atmosphere of uncertainty and fear. The course emphasises the role of trust-building through language. By using words that convey empathy, understanding, and unconditional support, caregivers can establish a foundation of trust that is essential for effective communication with anxious children. This trust becomes a secure base from which children can explore and navigate their emotions. Anxiety Coach also provides strategies on emotion coaching for parents to teach emotional literacy to their children.

Radical downtime

The brain needs downtime to process information, store memories and develop new neurological connections. Anxiety Coach emphasises the importance of ‘Radical Downtime’ and dives deeper into how it can help reduce anxiety in children. Here are some ideas for how you can introduce radical downtime:

  • Nature Scavenger Hunt: Create a list of items for a nature scavenger hunt in your local park or neighbourhood. Kids can explore, discover, and collect treasures along the way.

  • Artistic Mess: Embrace the mess and let kids explore their artistic side with unconventional materials. Finger painting with pudding, creating mud sculptures, or using vegetables as paintbrushes can be both messy and creative.

  • Mindfulness activities: mindful breathing, sensory exploration, and focused observation.

Navigating childhood anxiety requires a holistic approach that includes effective communication, understanding and mitigating cognitive distortions, addressing accommodation behaviours, and building a foundation of trust through emotion coaching. The Anxiety Coach course emerges as a guiding light, not only recognizing the pivotal role of language in supporting anxious children but also providing tangible strategies for professionals to equip parents. By fostering trust, teaching emotional literacy, and introducing radical downtime activities, caregivers are empowered with tools to create a supportive environment where anxious children can thrive. This comprehensive framework not only tackles the immediate challenges but also lays the groundwork for long-term resilience, emphasizing that with the right language and strategies, caregivers can become powerful allies in a child's journey to manage and overcome anxiety.

If you are a child and family specialist and want to elevate the support you offer, enrol in ANXIETY COACH now - https://www.parentshop.com.au/professionals/anxiety-coach-family-specialists


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